Trauma Isn’t Trendy: Let’s Stop Misusing The Word

Nervous System episode with Lauren Starnes:

https://www.buzzsprout.com/1027246/episodes/18786923

Healing starts when we stop guessing and start listening to the body. We kick off a focused season by defining trauma in plain language, mapping the window of tolerance, and showing how the nervous system becomes both the alarm and the doorway back to calm. I share why misusing the word “trauma” muddies real suffering, how symptoms show up in bodies first, and what changes when we treat headaches, insomnia, gut pain, and tension as data instead of defects.

From there, we unpack PTSD without blame. You’ll hear how clinicians assess reliving, avoidance, mood shifts, and hyperarousal; why timing separates acute stress from PTSD; and how a clear name can reduce shame and open access to care. We also preview a body-led approach with co-host Lauren Starnes, the “trauma translator,” whose work centers on nervous system regulation so the mind can safely process what happened. Regulation before revelation becomes our guiding practice.

Two listener questions bring this to ground. First, how to protect children from your own trauma: do the work, model repair, and let your regulation lead. Second, what to do after a harmful EMDR experience: safety is treatment, trust the rupture, and consider proven options like CPT, CBT, IFS, narrative therapy, and somatic skills. Throughout, we emphasize practical tools—grounding, paced breathing, orienting, and gentle movement—to discharge survival energy and widen your capacity.

We close with news close to my heart: the launch of Victory Trauma Consulting, offering accessible one-on-one support, education for churches and workplaces, and pricing that meets people where they are. If you’re ready to understand triggers and flashbacks, regulate your nervous system, and reclaim a life that feels abundant and free, join us. Subscribe, share this with a friend who needs hope, and leave a review so others can find these tools. Your body is speaking. Let’s learn its language together.

You ARE:
SEEN KNOWN HEARD LOVED VALUED

Transcript

New Season Vision And Mission

SPEAKER_00 0:02

Hey everyone, and welcome back to the Wednesdays with Watson Podcast. My name is Dr. Watson, also known as the Trauma Doc. And I am your host. The Wednesdays with Watson Podcast exists to give hope, help, and education related to trauma and all of its friends. Welcome guys to the new season. We are going to barrel into this season with everything we have got. This is the first full season that we will do after I receive my doctorate degree in trauma and community care from Liberty University. More on that journey probably this season, but in this season, the trauma doc is what we are calling it. It is my goal to domystify trauma and help you, the listener, begin healing. If you have been on this planet for any amount of time, you have likely experienced trauma. And as we enter into this new season, I want to acknowledge that and re-release two episodes that are aimed to educate you to the point where then we can do some real work in the new season, the new episodes, to promote healing from trauma, anxiety, insomnia, perfectionism, overgiver, burnout. We hope to dive into and press into these issues, and we hope by one of my guests who is going to serve as my co-host, Lauren Starnes, that we can help you connect with your nervous system, especially when you have a history of psychological trauma. We will educate you on the clinical definition of trauma. What is it? I just spent three years studying that. What are triggers? What are flashbacks? What are proven therapies that will help you gain your life back, or for some of you, maybe live it fully for the first time ever? It would be my honor to help you do that. If you're new here, you are you don't know, but I live with complex post-traumatic stress disorder, and while mostly managed with some tools and therapies that I will cover in this podcast and have covered in this podcast, I unfortunately recent recently experienced an event that triggered all those things that I thought were healed. So it's bringing new meaning to me as I bring you new content of what it means to heal from trauma and how that probably means something different for all of us. For me, I'm noticing that it is not a one and done. And as I get older, my body screams for attention because it has carried me all of this time. One of the episodes that we're releasing today is my friend Lauren Starnes, who is the trauma translator. And I have worked with Lauren personally and now professionally. We will bring you episodes together. And one of these two episodes that you will hear after this is my interview with her when the body talks. What is your body telling you? Because as Lauren likes to say, when you experience trauma, your body will say, I will hold on to this for you for now. But eventually it's my turn, your body is saying. So for those of you with screaming bodies, there is hope for you as there is hope for me. So today's two episodes that we are re-releasing cover trauma basics, and that one is called PTSD 101, and nervous system regulation with Lauren Starnes and her highlighting her program, When the Body Talks. These episodes are meant to wet your appetite for releases that are coming in the spring with Lauren and with me. Lauren being a nervous system regulator and me being a trauma doc. We want to educate you and help you about the nervous system, how to reset it, how to regulate it, how to listen to it, how to know what it's saying to you, and why you need to do that because of psychological trauma. Because you see, this is the only body that you'll ever have, and it's our hope that this series with Lauren will point you in the direction that you need to chase an accomplished healing. So if you're new to this podcast, welcome to My Passion: helping people find hope and help after experiencing psychological trauma. My definition of trauma has certainly changed over the years, and one of the most transformational experiences of my life has been understanding the nuances of trauma and how it affects my body. You see, this is life-changing transformational work, and so don't subscribe, don't listen to this podcast if you don't want to be responsible for information that will change your life. I can't wait to share some relatable knowledge with you as it pertains to trauma. And I know Lauren can't wait to share knowledge that she has from her work as a trauma, as a nervous system regulator and helping people, like I said, for the first time, maybe capture what their body is trying to say to them. So first up is the PTSD 101, and then if you will look in the show notes, Lauren's episode is there, or it is the very next episode that will play in your podcast player. If you're listening to Lauren's episode first when the body talks, the link will also be in the show notes for PTSD 101 and also the the podcast in your podcast player right before the one that you're listening to. Then in two weeks, Lauren and I will start the conversation that will hopefully be your first steps to healing and chasing the life that was meant for you by the God of the universe, a life that is abundant and free. You are so valuable, and this fight for your wellness is a worthy fight, and one that I want to fight with you. Knowledge is such power, and when you understand how your life experiences shape your everyday life and when you learn to listen to what your body is saying, you can live a life that is abundant and free. Not a perfect life, but take it from somebody who has experienced significant psychological trauma. Here I am behind a microphone talking to you, not necessarily all good. As I said, I just recently relapsed, if that's a word, where my trauma has come back to me, and I am having to practice what I preach as the trauma doc. So listen to these two episodes. Make sure you are following or subscribing wherever you're listening, and we will be back in two weeks as Amy and Lauren begin the conversation about trauma and nervous system recognition and nervous system regulation and nervous system maintenance. And I'm gonna help you understand why your trauma has affected you like it has. And so I hope you will join us for this new season, Wednesdays with Watson, the trauma doc. Until we come back to you in two weeks, you are seen, you are known, you are heard, you are loved, and you are so, so valued. See you guys in two weeks. Okay, so here we are. Let's start with our PTSD and trauma 101 from the beginning. A question that people ask me a lot, and they don't really know that they're asking because they are so not knowledgeable about what's going on in their own bodies and about their lives. And we hear this word trauma used a lot. We hear trauma used a lot, we hear the word triggered a lot. And I am a little bit worried about that in the sense that we throw everything, we throw that those titles on everything, we throw trauma on, you know, things that just aren't trauma. And that's just kind of people say that tongue in cheek, but it it is bothersome to me because trauma is uh destructive, and most people don't know what we in the field as experts call trauma. So trauma is an intense uh emotional and psychological response to an event that is experienced deeply when you experience it is distressing and also disturbing. Trauma can be a single event, and most people are able to really recover from single event traumas like a car accident, for example, um hurricane, uh, an assault, but then that we also have repeated exposure to distressing situations. Now, we always talk about this, and we've talked about this many, many times on this podcast about trauma and why we don't compare it, and what makes an event like a car accident or repeated exposure to distressing events, what makes that trauma, what makes those of us in the field call that trauma? And we have big T traumas and little T traumas, but either way, trauma is destructive if it's not handled. And so think of, first of all, we know that everyone on this planet, uh, Genesis uh 1.16 tells us that we are made in the image of God. Each of us are made differently, and therefore each of us are going to respond to events differently. I many times have people ask me questions like, I grew up in the same house with my sibling, who basically we went through the same thing. Why am I struggling with this? What's wrong with me? And the question is, nothing is wrong with you. We use the term a lot in the the field called the window of tolerance. This is how you're made. This is your ability to deal with distressing and disturbing situations. This does not make you weak. It does not make you anything except for who you are. And so when something bursts through your window of tolerance or your capacity to deal with things, then that is when this can become a traumatic event. So that sometimes will come in physical symptoms. We know this headaches, fatigue, muscle tension, fast heart rate, inability to sleep, a stomach, GI issues, many, many physical symptoms can happen when somebody has experienced a traumatic event, especially a child who doesn't have the ability to articulate what's going on, when they experience a traumatic event. And remember that children, especially up to around age eight, nine, 10, they believe that the world revolves around them because they have not created, basically they are operating in their ego sense. This is the way God made us, because they need to depend on caregivers. And so when a child experiences a traumatic event, it is particularly uh destructive if we don't notice what's going on. And and because they don't have the words to attach to it, and because they think that the everything is about them, they make everything their fault. And so lots of children will walk around from an early early age, and some of you probably walked around from an early age with something unresolved because you experience a traumatic event and it bursted through your capacity or your window of tolerance. And so children often will have physical symptoms, headaches, they don't want to go to school, they can't sleep, those kinds of things. But the body keeps the score, and this is something that we're going to talk about a lot on this series that we're calling PTSD 101, trauma 101, is the body keeps the score. And so this is why we must address trauma. And so trauma is again anything that a person experiences that will burst through that window of tolerance, and they don't have the coping skills or you don't have the coping skills to deal with it. And so it could be anything. And just because it's traumatic for you doesn't mean it's traumatic for somebody else, and vice versa. And remember, we do not compare trauma. Obviously, trauma has with it, and we're going to take much deeper dives in this today, is kind of a macro coverage of the word trauma and basically how we can understand it. But it also clearly has emotional symptoms. This comes through with fear and anxiety, depression, anger, difficulty in relationships, hypervigilance, all of these emotional issues. Because again, when when an event has happened, either a single event or a repeated event has happened that bursts through your window of tolerance, then your body is going to say, yo, stop. And oftentimes we go into survival mode and back to the physical symptoms for a second, when your nervous system is out of range, in other words, it is everything going on in your life is too much for you to handle. That energy, that emotion, that anxiety has to go somewhere. And so a lot of times in trauma work, we will uh start with body work, helping people understand how they feel in their bodies and how trauma gets stuck in their bodies. Because if we can't calm the nervous system, we can't treat the trauma. And so these physical and emotional symptoms that come with when we have trauma has to be addressed in the body first. And that's something that we're going to talk about a lot on this series, leading all through June with PTSD Awareness Month. And so we have the definition of trauma being something that bursts through your capacity, it bursts through your window of tolerance, it bursts through your natural ability to deal. And your body will continue to keep that score, it'll continue to rack up the days until you effectively deal with the trauma. And in this series, we're going to talk about modalities to treat trauma. So we have the physical symptoms, we have the emotional symptoms, we also have behavioral symptoms. And this is uh something that, again, we want to watch for in children, but we want to also watch for in ourselves. Things like isolating, withdrawal from social activities, lack of trust of other people, sometimes anger. Sometimes we come across people at the hospital where I work, now that I'm on the front lines of working with uh trauma patients and people with severe mental illness who are hospitalized. A lot of times these people come in angry and they come in completely traumatized, and their behavior sometimes requires us to give them an emergency treatment order because that stuff has to go somewhere. If you ignore it, it will come for you. And I want to say that again. If you ignore trauma, it will come for you. And so that's why it is so important to make sure that we are addressing these things that bursts burst through our capacity or our window of tolerance. And we understand that physical symptoms are manifested and they will be the loudest until we pay attention to them. And so for those of you that listened to the three episodes prior to this, you heard in an episode that we called originally hospitals and courtrooms how that affected me physically. I have four autoimmune diseases and live with just uh health struggles every single day because I went 35 years without addressing the traumatic events of my life. And so we're going to talk a lot about body work in this series that we're doing on PTSD. The second question I want to cover today in this series before we get to the two listener questions is what is post-traumatic stress disorder? That's a million-dollar question, right? Many of us in the field have dropped the disorder off of the PTSD part of post-traumatic stress disorder because in fact, when the body responds with PTSD symptoms, that is exactly what it's supposed to do because it's been pushed outside of the window of tolerance. It's been pushed outside of that individual's ability to deal. And therefore, it is not a disorder. It is the way God made us and it is the way that we should respond. But and as a matter of fact, we've been looking for language for post-traumatic stress disorder for since literally the Civil War, where and we've used words from all through war like heart uh war neuroses, a soldier's heart, um, shell shock. And it wasn't until late 1980 that we gave language to post-traumatic stress disorder. And now, hopefully in the next DSM, we will have just post-traumatic stress and not post-traumatic stress disorder. This is something that we that is pretty simple, actually, for those of us in the field to assess whether or not somebody has post-traumatic stress disorder is one of the very few times that I am in lockstep agreement with the DSM or the diagnostic statistical manual for for mental disorders. And so one of the things that I love to do is assess for trauma PTSD and help people understand whether or not they have a diagnosis of PTSD. I know for me, putting language on it, putting a diagnosis on it was so incredibly helpful for me. And so there are certain things that we that we go through that when we assess for PTSD. But some of the things that that we look for very much on the macro scale before we assess is people reliving the trauma. This was something that was particularly hard for me. And that came in the way of nightmares and flashbacks and other intrusive thoughts. When we look for avoidance behaviors, for me, that was put my head down and keep working and not addressing the trauma that happened to us. So we look for avoidance behaviors, we look for negative thoughts and mood changes like guilt and shame and depression, detachment from loved ones. We look for hyper-arousal, easily scar uh startled, things of that nature. PTSD can happen in anyone, but people that are more vulnerable to it do have some genetic components, have some psychological components, and have environmental factors. And so post-traumatic stress can be assessed. It can be assessed quite easily, and it is something that I love to do because I I again when we put a a diagnosis, a something that everybody can wrap their head around on what we are feeling inside, that is actually helpful. And so these episodes are going to be shorter, and so these as we as we lead up to uh post-traumatic stress disorder month, and hopefully we'll get more and more questions. But today I wanted to cover what is trauma, and and really, guys, if you're asking whether something was a traumatic event in your life, it probably is. And so, what is trauma and what is PTSD? Now, there's also something called acute stress disorder, and that is uh the precursor to post-traumatic stress disorder. And so one of my passions is getting to people before acute stress disorder, which happens immediately after the event from turning into post-traumatic stress disorder. Because you see, post-traumatic stress disorder, the symptoms have to stay around for a while before we can diagnose it. But acute stress disorder is what we expect to happen when somebody is in a fight or flight or fawn or freeze because they have uh had a traumatic event, burst through their window of tolerance or burst through their capacity. And so I hope that these two questions or these two points are helpful for you on this PTSD 101 or trauma 101 series that we're doing. We are going to take our time. And so I again wanted you guys to understand the very foundations of what we're dealing with, but understand that if many of you out there are walking around with dregulated nervous systems, and one of the best things that ever happened to me was when I got connected with Lauren Starnes, who uh went I went through a program when the body talks, and I will link that episode in this one. But when I began to do the body work, uh was just a nice one-to punch for when I actually ended up really kind of working through the trauma to where it wasn't causing me maladaptive issues. And again, if you want to know why I care and what I've been through, uh just the episodes before these, the three episodes, what is the Wednesday with Watson podcasts, what is the Wednesdays with Watson Podcast part two and part three, listen to those, start with the first one, and you'll understand why I care. And how I went from that hammock that April day uh when the pandemic first started and completely changed my life to where I now am all but dissertation with a doctorate degree in trauma and community care, and I work on the front lines with patients. And so with that said, let's answer these two listener questions and then the announcement that you've all been waiting for. And I say that with tongue in cheek because I know that's probably not actually true, but it is an ex is an exciting and exciting announcement. So here are the two listener questions, and then after that, the announcement. Okay, so this comes to us uh via direct message on Facebook. The Wednesdays with Watson Podcast does have a Facebook page. It's called the Wednesdays with Watson Podcast, and so you can certainly go there to leave questions. Uh, you can message us through there. You can also catch us on Instagram, AuthorAmy Watson, and or on Twitter. Also, I believe that one is Amy Watson Author. I'll put my link tree in the show notes, as well as you can also send a message through the podcast by just hitting send a text message. And again, I'm the only one that gets that. And so if you want me to address a question while we are really uh putting our heads down and focusing on helping you understand trauma and PTSD leading up to June, which is PTSD Awareness Month, then please reach out in any way that you can. As Any F Down says, I'm embarrassingly easy to find. And so this one comes to us via Facebook Messenger. She said, What what I want to know about trauma is how can I protect my children from my own trauma and prevent myself from causing trauma to other people. What a great question and when it comes from somebody who really just wants to get this right. And so what I want to know about trauma is how can I protect children from my own trauma? And the answer to this question is simple but not easy. And how we can protect our children from trauma is by dealing with that trauma. And what I mean by dealing with that trauma is you have to walk through it. You have to deal with it. You have to address it. And that's the hard part. And so my suggestion to this listener is to reach out to someone who can help walk through trauma. Somebody that can assess whether or not you have PTSD and whether or not you need some help that is um that would be advantageous to first you. And I love this question because this question is deeply rooted in the desire to take care of children and other people but I know this listener and love this listener and hope that you will make the decision to deal with your trauma because it's good for you. And then that being the first thing that you do and then obviously it's good for other people when you have walked through your own trauma. There's a saying out there that says hurting people hurt people and healed people heal people. And what I would say to this listener is hurting people hurt people and healed people heal people. I love that saying I believe that it is true. And I think that as a parent when you have your own trauma and when your children get older and you're able to share if you're so inclined with those children and they look back on their lives and look at how that never affected them or if it did affect them. You guys walked through it in a way that was healthy and good. I think that that is the highest form of love when you do take care of yourself so that you can take care of your children. And I get emotional when I answer this question simply because my mom didn't do that. And because of that her trauma was passed down to me and I don't say that to activate anything and any listener out there, but the the bottom line is if you've got unresolved trauma, it will affect you and your children at some point. I have a very actually my best friend in the whole wide world who I grew up with in the children's home has been really my whole life since I've known her for almost gosh I think we figured out that it would be forty years and a couple years. She is just now remembering things that happened to her in her childhood because she just kind of went through life and like I did and just kept doing kept being kept doing all the things and then finally trauma came knocking at her door. It will do that guys. It will either do that like we talked about early in emotions and physical senses and behavioral issues or it will shut down your body. And so I appreciate this listener question because she does not want to pass her children her trauma on to her children. And the the answer for that listener is quite simple. The way through it is through it and so working with your own trauma will ensure that you don't pass it on to them in the way that would be negative. And so I hope that helps this listener. We've got one more question. This one is um a little bit deeper in in the way and so I'm just going to read it exactly as it came to me and attempt to answer it as much as I can. But this came to us through text messaging a listener in Connecticut sent this message and this is what it says hey I have PTSD and bipolar disorder the worst combination in the history of mental illness that along with severe anger issues mostly because I can't understand why God chose me to have disorder my therapist wants to do EMDR with me. I keep avoiding it because of the last time I went there my feelings were terribly hurt. I told the EMDR therapists um that and they laughed at me for uh being beat by my foster mother and some of her family. On top of that I have been abused twice and there's a word there that I I won't use on the podcast but it is not physically abused twice in my life on top of being bullied at school when I was a child. Do you think I should be treated with EMDR? Because I wish there was another treatment better than I am getting uh right now in therapy. I have been untreated my whole child until I turned 18. I'm terrified to revisit those days of my life and my foster mother tried to kill me. How do I face the fear of my trauma looking away from my life? Anytime I revisit it I have the ache of revenge and fury I get flashbacks uh to back up the hospital more times than I've been than than I can count. I've been hospitalized 13 times. I hate myself for that it just makes me feel insane and crazy. I just want to be happy and at peace and I hate when my past revisited me and nowhere please uh there has to be a better way first of all this this message broke my heart and because it is filled it is laced with multiple concerns and multiple questions for this listener. First of all the double punch of PTSD and bipolar disorder the worst combination in history as this listener said and yes a bad combination bipolar disorder is not my specialty but it is one that we see a lot in patients that have trauma extreme highs extreme lows and very difficult to treat. You add to that trauma and you add in this particular listener talks about angry being anger anger is definitely a uh something that we see a lot in patients with post-traumatic stress and bipolar disorder for that matter we often say that anger is fear's bodyguard and so when people are angry they are actually afraid and so what I would say to this listener who had a negative experience with EMDR I'm first of all that I am so sorry EMDR is my favorite treatment modality that I like but what I would suggest for you is to get with someone that you do trust that can properly assess you for all of the things and then walk you through different treatment modalities. If it's not EMDR we have a lot of success with cognitive processing therapy cognitive behavior therapy family internal family systems narrative therapies there's many many more things that you can do but the bottom line is that you've got multiple layers of trauma that need someone to that you need someone to work with you for a good amount of time that you can trust and so that we can get first of all get that anger and in the compartment where it belongs and that you can use that anger to fuel you to help you. You did mention in here that you're angry at God for all of the things I get you I hear you and I know that there are other listeners out there who feel the same. What I would tell you is get in the ring and have that wrestling match with God. But my answer to you is to find somebody that you do trust that can help you, that can assess you, that can help understand your trauma and that can find a treatment modality that does work for you that perhaps isn't EMDR but that is something else. There are many empirically supported treatments for trauma that we can use. And so I hope that helps you to the listener in Connecticut and please know that I am praying for you and definitely hope that you can get through this. I know that you can but I also know that the only way through it is through it. And so I do wish you the best and hope that you can find somebody that can help you and that you trust and that can uh help you have a life and that you can have a life that is abundant and free. Okay guys that does it for this first episode of Trauma 101 PTSD 101 we are going to be diving deeply uh in all the things over the next several episodes this episode hopefully was here to help you understand trauma and help you understand a little bit about PTSD we'll talk about assessing PTSD and some more specific things about how we do that and the upcoming episodes. And so now for the announcement that you've all been waiting for and I say that in tongue in cheek but it is a an announcement that I'm excited to give you. And so in this uh five year journey that has been the Wednesdays with Watson podcast and myself becoming an advocate a voice if you will for trauma and for PTSD and for nervous system regulation I have continued just to ask the Lord what he would require of me and what he wants of me. One of the episodes I told you guys a story about when I was a teenager and I went to a summer camp and I remember learning the verse in Isaiah 6 verse 8 and 9 where the Lord says who shall I send and who will go for us and Isaiah said I am I send me and so I've been fighting something for a very long time and that is getting on the front lines and actually helping people one-on-one not through a microphone walk through trauma understand PTSD and more importantly get some really good coping mechanisms and coping strategies so that they could have victory over their trauma with some professional help. As many of you know this podcast always has had a heart to raise money for those people who can't afford counseling who can't afford somebody to help them whether that's from assessing trauma or helping them walk through it or uh helping uh address these behavioral issues that we talked about today or these physical issues that we talked about today or these emotional issues that we talked about today. And so when I started this journey of getting my doctorate degree in trauma and community care I said to everybody but I won't be I won't be working one-on-one with people because that's I'm not built for that well the Lord said really you are because that's exactly what I want you to do. And so this is the announcement we are launching soft launching Victory Trauma Consulting and this is a new business that I am opening that will open services to anyone who wants some one-on-one work with understanding trauma how to walk through it how to to address these emotional behavioral and physical issues that come with trauma and much much more it will include speaking to churches and to workplaces and the trauma informed workplace the trauma informed church it will include just about anything that the Lord opens up or brings to me pricing will be based on what the individual has the ability to pay and as this is something that the Lord has called me to and so I am not super concerned about any of that that will be on a one-on-one basis and so if you are interested in that be watching all the socials again mainly Instagram author Amy Watson and we will provide ways for you to book a quick little 15 minute session with me to see whether or not this is a fit whether I can help you but Victory Trauma Consulting is I got the name from when I was in college my senior year of college I took a class of biblical counseling and training and I had to do a capstone project and in that capstone project I said that I wanted to open a counseling center one day and I called it Victory Counseling Center. And so we're here we are almost 40 years later actually 30 35 years later and I am doing just that and so be looking on all the socials again it is for Instagram it is authorAmy Watson and for Twitter or ex Amy Watson author. And again I will put that in my link tree but if you would like to uh do a consultation with me go ahead and check out socials or check out my link tree and you can uh schedule a little 15 minute session with me and we will see if I can help you and if the Lord has called me to stand in that place for you.

SPEAKER_01 33:51

And so I am so excited to finally make this announcement and this is the passion of my heart is the passion of my work and now is what I'm educated to do while I am writing my dissertation I have had all of the coursework and certainly have been through it all myself and so I am here to help Victory Trauma Consulting is launched this day on March the 12th 2025 oh oh oh what a journey this last five years has been the Lord is faithful and I have answered the call then said I send me you guys have a great two weeks remember you are seen you are known you are heard you are loved and you're so so bad here I am you can see that I'm knowing you and want to be like you remain so good and you never change the perfect way to stay on with store you are only out of dead you have to take me from dead you have to be all that called but you can teach me to be stuff I want to use